Confusion on Sex Life

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BeholDConfusion
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Confusion on Sex Life

Postby BeholDConfusion » Sat Mar 10, 2018 8:54 am

So I'm 19 and she's 18. We've been together for a year and a half ( in 4 days) and she has never been the one to initiate sex. A little bit more of a back story, we still live with our parents, so whenever we hang out someone is most likely home. And for the shocker... She has never masturbated. Yes, you can call me a liar and you can call her a liar. But she said as she was growing up, it was just never a thing, she never looked it up, she never had anyone talk to her about it, and it just never became a big part of her life. So, this leads me to the problem of Sex. I am absolutely the giver in this relationship. And I absolutely love it. I would say on a good week she allows me to do stuff maybe twice a week unfortunately. Now for the problem. She has never fully reciprocated for me. Ever. Not once. And I've done it for her probably over 100 times. And I've even gone down on her a handful of times. She would start a hand job and then end it after about 30 seconds saying sorry. I don't usually get anything out of it. And it just makes me want it more even after she's done. It breaks my heart because she will just go on and watch videos. We'll cuddle but she'll forget all about it afterwards. And for the even worse part, we haven't had sex in 3 months. I'm not pressuring her. I'd often ask her if we could do it soon and she would say "Absolutely, I want it too" In total, we've probably had sex 25 or so times in our entire relationship. That's... not normal for young teenagers. It breaks my heart because when we talk about it, I can absolutely tell that she feels bad. Saying stuff like "I'm sorry I was born this way" or "I'm sorry I can't change for you"

And... I don't know if I just haven't been good enough in bed for her to get the impression that.. "Hey I would really love doing this again because it feels amazing" Because I give her an orgasm every time.
Honestly... I just wanna make her scream. Please help!

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Starshine
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Re: Confusion on Sex Life

Postby Starshine » Sat Mar 10, 2018 9:51 am

First of all, please don’t post the same things in different sections. Secondly, the lack pf paragraphs makes such a long post very difficult to digest. You have to help others to help you.

You say she has “allowed you” to do stuff but she does not reciprocate. Allowed you to do what exactly? Sex tends to be a 2 way thing by its very nature.

What is this thing that you have done 100 times and yet you have only gone down on her a handful of times? Sounds like a raw deal to me.

Problem number 1, It seems fairly evident that you are not hitting the right spots if she would rather watch a video. I was certainly nothing like that at her age.

Problem number 2, if she has never masturbated (and only she knows the answer to that one and had the right to her own counsel), she does not know her own body. The female body is highly complex. If she doesn’t know her own, there is little chance of you “learning” it. She needs that self discovery road first, then she can help you to help her.

Finally one vital question. What are you doing for contraception? Unwanted pregnancy risk does not lead to happy sex.
Last edited by Starshine on Tue May 22, 2018 8:52 am, edited 1 time in total.

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emilycurious
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Re: Confusion on Sex Life

Postby emilycurious » Sat Mar 10, 2018 4:23 pm

If you see Kay
Last edited by emilycurious on Mon Mar 19, 2018 9:22 pm, edited 1 time in total.
"Men are afraid that women will laugh at them. Women are afraid that men will kill them." Attributed to Margaret Atwood.

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Mr.Married
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Re: Confusion on Sex Life

Postby Mr.Married » Sat Mar 10, 2018 8:20 pm

Is she........Roman Catholic?

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Mr.Married
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Re: Confusion on Sex Life

Postby Mr.Married » Sat Mar 10, 2018 8:21 pm

emilycurious wrote:Dude, for the 100 times you "done it for her" did she orgasm?
She might think grabbing your coçk for 30 seconds is exactly equivalent to what you are doing for her.


:clap: :clap: :clap:

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Mr.Married
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Re: Confusion on Sex Life

Postby Mr.Married » Sat Mar 10, 2018 8:58 pm

Look kid...I really want to help you but there is a huge amount of ground to cover here. Don't EVER EVER make her feel like she is doing something "wrong" when it comes to sex. Your only putting stress on her and she is likely nervous enough already. If she isn't comfortable in her surrounding environment when your together she is likely going to have a hard time focusing as well. Get over the fact that she doesn't initiate, just get over it.. really..get over it. Take her on a date, treat her like a queen. Get a hotel room if you need privacy. Foreplay isn't trying to figure out how to undo her bra. Take your time, take your time, take time, take your time...did I mention take your time? Girls love oral sex....give it to her. Did you remember the part where I said don't EVER
make her feel like she is doing something wrong? There is no such thing as a "normal" amount of sex. Everyone is different. Trust me....all your friends aren't having as much sex as you think. Cut your girl some slack

Go buy some condoms...right now

BeholDConfusion
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Re: Confusion on Sex Life

Postby BeholDConfusion » Sun Mar 11, 2018 1:21 am

Okay yeah, firs time posting here. Sorry about that. Anyway, to address some of the problems.

Condoms. Yes. Every time. I'm not stupid.

Fingering. Thats the 100 times. And I don't go down on her much because she likes kissing me while I do stuff. I would LOVE to do it more. And yes I'm fairly certain I've been giving her orgasms. At least she says she did. I mean.. she screams pretty loud and sometimes squirts.

EDIT: That "Allowed" part are the semi rare times she wants it.

I don't EVER make her feel bad. Yes, we talk about how I feel because I really don't feel wanted. But that's it. I never pressure her to do stuff with me.

And finally, I often do take time unless we're short on time which isn't often. Sometimes even that small amount of stuff lasts a pretty long 40 minutes for just manual stuff. Not even sex.

Might've missed stuff. Poor memory. But hopefully that clears some things up

EDIT2: Could it be that when she orgasms that it takes a lot out of her? She often will say how great it was but say she's tired. Sometimes even falls asleep in my arms within minutes after. Just a thought.

Castiel15
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Re: Confusion on Sex Life

Postby Castiel15 » Mon Apr 16, 2018 3:28 pm

BeholDConfusion wrote:So I'm 19 and she's 18. We've been together for a year and a half ( in 4 days) and she has never been the one to initiate sex. A little bit more of a back story, we still live with our parents, so whenever we hang out someone is most likely home. And for the shocker... She has never masturbated. Yes, you can call me a liar and you can call her a liar. But she said as she was growing up, it was just never a thing, she never looked it up, she never had anyone talk to her about it, and it just never became a big part of her life. So, this leads me to the problem of Sex. I am absolutely the giver in this relationship. And I absolutely love it. I would say on a good week she allows me to do stuff maybe twice a week unfortunately. Now for the problem. She has never fully reciprocated for me. Ever. Not once. And I've done it for her probably over 100 times. And I've even gone down on her a handful of times. She would start a hand job and then end it after about 30 seconds saying sorry. I don't usually get anything out of it. And it just makes me want it more even after she's done. It breaks my heart because she will just go on and watch videos. We'll cuddle but she'll forget all about it afterwards. And for the even worse part, we haven't had sex in 3 months. I'm not pressuring her. I'd often ask her if we could do it soon and she would say "Absolutely, I want it too" In total, we've probably had sex 25 or so times in our entire relationship. That's... not normal for young teenagers. It breaks my heart because when we talk about it, I can absolutely tell that she feels bad. Saying stuff like "I'm sorry I was born this way" or "I'm sorry I can't change for you"

And... I don't know if I just haven't been good enough in bed for her to get the impression that.. "Hey I would really love doing this again because it feels amazing" Because I give her an orgasm every time.
Honestly... I just wanna make her scream. Please help!



try different or new approach and also try to educate her. She never do masturbate? then educate her about masturbation, tell her the benefits about doing such thing. Try also to be more romantic, that thing we tend to forgot when having sex because we just focused on the pleasure.

Zolton
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Re: Confusion on Sex Life

Postby Zolton » Wed Apr 25, 2018 3:33 pm

you just have to wait, you too young

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Elysa
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Re: Confusion on Sex Life

Postby Elysa » Tue May 15, 2018 10:47 am

BeholDConfusion wrote:
EDIT2: Could it be that when she orgasms that it takes a lot out of her? She often will say how great it was but say she's tired. Sometimes even falls asleep in my arms within minutes after. Just a thought.



Poor Behol hasn't returned.

I wonder if he ever figured out that she was faking her orgasms.


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