I don't fit in.

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Demoner450
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I don't fit in.

Postby Demoner450 » Sun Sep 10, 2017 9:50 pm

Hi.

I'm seeking advice on how to make a girl more relaxed. Story goes, I met a girl while camping. We got on really well and kept in touch after the camp. She went away abroad for a year and we kept talking till she came back. We decided to meet up and slowly took things further. Now after 3 months of being in a relationship we have tried to have sex twice. Both times she hasn't been able to relax properly to the point I can't actually fit in. We both really would like to have sex, so if anyone knows how to solve this please let me know.

Many thanks.

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emilycurious
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Re: I don't fit in.

Postby emilycurious » Sun Sep 10, 2017 9:56 pm

Don't have sex.
Pleasure her without penetration, ask her what she wants you to do (other than penetration).
Do this for a year, then she'll be more relaxed.
“Cut the ending. Revise the script. The man of her dreams is a girl.” ― Julie Anne Peters

Demoner450
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Re: I don't fit in.

Postby Demoner450 » Sun Sep 10, 2017 10:59 pm

I have pleasured her with my hands which she enjoyed. But she is more keen then me to have sex. The weird thing is that she's felt the most comfortable with me then any other guy (that's what she said anyway) and she's also taken bigger then me.

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Elysa
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Re: I don't fit in.

Postby Elysa » Mon Sep 11, 2017 1:50 am

Demoner450 wrote:Hi.

I'm seeking advice on how to make a girl more relaxed. Story goes, I met a girl while camping. We got on really well and kept in touch after the camp. She went away abroad for a year and we kept talking till she came back. We decided to meet up and slowly took things further. Now after 3 months of being in a relationship we have tried to have sex twice. Both times she hasn't been able to relax properly to the point I can't actually fit in. We both really would like to have sex, so if anyone knows how to solve this please let me know.

Many thanks.



I thought this thread was going to be about fitting in with peers or society in general. Nope, you really mean fitting in. :lol:

Everyone has their problems with sex, getting him in there is mine. But I've found hundreds of relaxation techniques. I'm an expert now. I should be, I've been doing them for 20+ years. She has to relax her mind and body. And yep! The more I like a guy, the more anxiety will pad lock my vagina. I know that feeling she's describing of wanting it. That urge to get him inside me, while it can be torture, it's also part of the relaxing process. Dear lord that tortuous feeling is absolutely wonderful.

She should never worry about this either. It's not near the issue as it used to be for me in the past. And, it's only helped create more kink.

She needs to breathe, then breathe and after that breathe. You know those Lamaze courses for pregnant ladies? Same principal here. She's got to target the muscles down there to get them to not contract during arousal. It's so fun and so easy and so kinky, but you've got to help her. First, don't rush her, make sure her mind is free from the worry of being rushed. During foreplay, which you will be doing A LOT of, you're going to help her relax her muscles and mind. While you're kissing her neck and gazing into her eyes, or whatever you do to, you know, get her warmed up. Press lightly on her pressure points with a flat hand, palm down. Under her heart, between her rib cage, press, release, press further down, release, press further down down down down. Make your way to the mons pubis. Stop! Stay here a while. Cup it and gently, lightly press. Release. Repeat. While you're doing this and the reason you're doing it, is to stimulate blood flow and swelling of her clitoris, vaginal lips, the entry, etc. Her body ain't stupid, it's getting itself ready for your man friend. Every inch of it. And you're helping her to relax at the same time. She needs to be taking deep breaths during foreplay. How long do you continue this foreplay/relaxation stuff? For as long as it takes until she's confident and aroused to the point that she's ready to fu*k an Ikea table leg.

There's also relation hip and pelvic movements. Thrusts, humps and circles. We've turned this into a voyeur kink dirty talk begging servant hands tied kind of scenario. As a result, I get orgasms from it.

Another great way to relax, two words: Vaginal massage. Sounds like you're doing this. It's fun, ain't it.

Every woman is different, but foreplay should take a while. (Personally, depending on my mood, what my desires are for the evening, and time of the month, ours lasts up to an hour. Or longer. Totally depends).

Don't forget, foreplay starts when you're being seated at the table of the restaurant you're going to take her to. Make sure she's wet when you're looking at the wine list. Waiting to have sex at home is optional. That reminds me, and this doesn't need to be said. Don't forget the lube.

It takes practice. So that means you should practice. When she feels relaxed and ready, but only when she's relaxed and ready. Fu*k her. Fu*k her and penetrate her. This helps condition the contracting muscles that are doing this in the first place. Fu*ck her over and over and over. Do not wait!

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emilycurious
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Re: I don't fit in.

Postby emilycurious » Mon Sep 11, 2017 3:47 pm

Demoner450 wrote:and she's also taken bigger then me.


ok, was she relaxed then?
does she masturbate? does she masturbate with toys?
also, when you are trying to have s e x, is she on top controlling everything?
If you answered yes to all of those, she just doesn't like you enough to F*** you.
But I would recommend you go down on her at least three times (and she comes every time) before you try any sex. She still might not F*** you but I'd be happier knowing she was having an okay time.
“Cut the ending. Revise the script. The man of her dreams is a girl.” ― Julie Anne Peters

Lestorke
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Re: I don't fit in.

Postby Lestorke » Tue Oct 17, 2017 11:41 am

Demoner450 wrote:Hi.

I'm seeking advice on how to make a girl more relaxed. Story goes, I met a girl while camping. We got on really well and kept in touch after the camp. She went away abroad for a year and we kept talking till she came back. We decided to meet up and slowly took things further. Now after 3 months of being in a relationship we have tried to have sex twice. Both times she hasn't been able to relax properly to the point I can't actually fit in. We both really would like to have sex, so if anyone knows how to solve this please let me know.

Many thanks.


Find out what she likes - a couple of glasses or vodka (if she is russian for example) can make wonders to the relaxation part :D
If you use that, have in mind that usually you will not need to do it second time as the first shyness will disappear afterwards

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UKGent
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Re: I don't fit in.

Postby UKGent » Wed Oct 18, 2017 11:50 pm

I think a search on the forum is the best advice because your question has been asked time and time again over the past decade.

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Lady J 624
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Re: I don't fit in.

Postby Lady J 624 » Mon Nov 20, 2017 5:46 pm

UKGent wrote:I think a search on the forum is the best advice because your question has been asked time and time again over the past decade.


Yes, but then what would we talk about? :)
"I love it when a plan comes together."

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ChristinaIsHere
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Re: I don't fit in.

Postby ChristinaIsHere » Mon Nov 27, 2017 8:33 am

emilycurious wrote:Don't have sex.
Pleasure her without penetration, ask her what she wants you to do (other than penetration).
Do this for a year, then she'll be more relaxed.


:clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: Very sexy! Stimulate the endorphins and set them ablaze with invigorating sensual teasing by tickling my intellect. When the sex actually happens it will be more intense. It's good to wait and it's good to know someone fully before giving someone yourself; to have that relaxed and take me as you will relaxation it's all about trust, and it's build through friendship and time. I don't' think the girlfriend is ready.

Jean-Louise
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Re: I don't fit in.

Postby Jean-Louise » Tue Nov 28, 2017 3:12 pm

Demoner450 wrote:Hi.

I'm seeking advice on how to make a girl more relaxed. Story goes, I met a girl while camping. We got on really well and kept in touch after the camp. She went away abroad for a year and we kept talking till she came back. We decided to meet up and slowly took things further. Now after 3 months of being in a relationship we have tried to have sex twice. Both times she hasn't been able to relax properly to the point I can't actually fit in. We both really would like to have sex, so if anyone knows how to solve this please let me know.

Many thanks.


Quit stressing. Relax. Let it happen.
Alcohol or weed can be good relaxing agents.
Just communicate and take things slowly.
:tounge:


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